Two Weeks Notice (Give Or Take A Week)

First things first. If you've never experienced what it's like to stand outside CBGB's shouting obscenities* at shifty Hot Topic clad punk rockin' jagoffs with America's number one TiVo devotee (that would be JP McKrengels, pictured at right above), let me just say that the only word to describe it is scrumtrillescent. You should have been there. Really. But since you weren't, just bask in the scrumtrillescence that digital camera(s) were able to preserve.

Now that we've established the historical resonance of the image above, your Uncle Grambo has some news to share with you and yours. After thirty-two magical years of local residency, I will soon be leaving behind the fruited plains of Detroit Rock City for the hipster-infested dystopia of the Big/Rotten Apple (which term you employ depends on your opinion of the ouevre of Lloyd Banks). Armed only with my depleted savings account, an array of digital video discs starring Amanda Bynes and a pocketful of mousetraps, I will be making my way eastward next week to begin a new career with a ragtag band of scallywags who call themselves Video Hits One. I have not yet been told how I will earn my keep, but I do know this — looks like the two summers during college I spent landscaping are finally going to payoff ... WHAMMY!

Which is to say that, over the next few weeks, the frequency with which I post PHC may dip even further below the woefully anemic rate that I have established over the last month or two (some say the last two years). Once the St. Lawrence River bound ferry I have commandeered hits the Eastern River of New Amsterdam, I will do my darndest to begin reestablishing the rapport with my readership and filling all y'all in on the details of my stead. Until then, howevs, let this serve as a preemptive warning that you should find your bad self a nice glass of sasparilla to sip on while the tumbling tumbleweeds begin to accumulate around this here Uniform Resource Locator. Fear not, your Uncle Grambo will continue to utilize this medium to make announcements and proclamations (like, say, GO TIGERS!) about my whereabouts and who I may or may not be boning. Believe you me that all will be revealed in good time, Houdini (not Whodini) stizz.

That is all. I'm out. Lates.

*No actual obscenities were shouted.